Moving Forward or Living Backwards…

Having moved twice in the last two years, provides little room for my heart to disengage from one state, re-engage into another and repeat the same scenario a year later. Through this rigorous journey, it has definitely taken a toll on my emotional, spiritual, physical and mental health.  I realized that I have the power to either continue to live my life looking backwards or I can choose to move forward, with my eyes on the horizon.

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So many people in my path have forgotten how to truly live forward.  They have chosen to stay in a mental state of always looking behind.  The ‘good old days’ are gone and what we have left is to embrace the future with both hands, hang on for the ride and when the journey ends one can say, “I lived with no regrets.”  This my friends is a difficult path to venture on.  The heart is not so easily convinced that the future is more promising than the former.  Waiting upon hindsight to come with which it brings more understanding, clarity & even beautiful memories.  Until that hindsight where does one linger, moving forward or living backwards?  

I’m choosing to live forward again.  To re-engage in the mystery and beauty of new-found adventures.  Finding hidden parks, a path where the trees speak to me as I walk amongst the breeze, water that calls for me to come for the pure enjoyment to refresh, a ‘hole in the wall’ cafe that locals frequent often and familiarity becomes second nature, or engaging with another person that forever becomes a soul connection.  These are the hidden gems that fulfill my soul.  The heart must remain open, aware that at any moment something delightful is just around the corner.  So my soul seeks carefully for as not to be discouraged when the time frame is not aligned with my heads.  In some ways my heart must trust what it does not see, hope for that which it does not know and believe that the very place I have been planted is to bloom and not wilt.  Living with great intention is how to fully become aware of yourself, expectations and the endless possibilities that are waiting. 

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Your journey may look, sound, feel, taste and smell very differently than mine, but the process is very similar. The intentionality of living life forward is a continual work in progress, for there are days that it just seems easier to live backwards.  Change seems too complicated, and when the brain often resurfaces a memory due to familiarity and comfort, that is when you must guard your heart.  Living backwards can often times be more painful than fully embracing the future!  

I close with one of my favorite quotes from Socrates,

“The Secret Of Change Is To Focus All Of Your Energy, Not On Fighting The Old,

But On Building The New.”

~~Pam~~     

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