Managing Grief During The Holidays

GRIEF, an emotion felt from deep within the soul, encompassing the entire self, unpredictable at best, a process that is endless, always emerging when the ‘holiday energy’ overtakes the season.  Grief, a ‘unpleasant friend’ in disguise, yet is as reliable as any given relationship.

For some, the holiday season is an over-whelming, strenuous time that stirs emotions, which most often lay dormant until triggered.  Anytime, anyplace, anywhere bouts of tears, loneliness, depression, sadness and anger are felt within the very person next to you.  

Yet, we continue on with the ‘hustle and bustle’ without stopping to ponder if those around us just need our ‘AWARENESS.’  

Acknowledging those we know who have recently ‘lost’ is easy, but what about all of the people we encounter, and have not even the slightest knowledge that their hearts are disconnected from their bodies.  They are numb, emotionless, and happiness graces them less now.  

Whether it be an aged-loved one who has passed, an unexpected death, a childless couple, a miscarriage, a job loss, a pet that is no more, or any other loss that affects the human heart, GRIEF is real and troublesome to deal with.

Reality enlightens us that nothing can be done for the person experiencing grief, however there are a few ways to bring a ‘heartfelt’ warmth into their life during a season of difficulty.

  • A Phone Call is worth its weight in gold, especially when loneliness sets in and reaching out to others does not seem feasible.
  • Notes of Encouragement are a simple way to speak to someone’s heart, letting them know they matter, are valued and loved.
  • Finding Creative Ways to Honor that which has brought about the grief.
  • Invitations extended for those grieving to be around others for a shared meal, activity or event.
  • Sending ‘Beauty,’ such as flowers, plants, baked goods, artwork, or anything else that would show the world is still a beautiful place.
  • Memories Shared are best re-lived when the person holding the grief invites us into their ‘vulnerability’ and we just LISTEN! 

   

~If the one experiencing GRIEF is ourselves, there are ways to cope without it seemingly feeling like a quick fix just so everyone else can feel better…..

  • Set Realistic Expectations that this year will be vastly different, and it’s okay to LET GO of what I should do, what I can do or what I used to do.
  • Encircle yourself with those that love and support you through the darkest days and happiest times.  Laughing one minute mixed with tears is a new emotion to be embraced by a strong support system.
  • Give Yourself Permission to really feel ALL of the emotions that are a natural component to grieving.
  • Finding Solitude to remember, honor, and embrace all that has happened is needed for their to be any response to healing.  
  • Joining like-minded groups, or finding people, that will understand and respect your grieving is extremely important to continue on in life’s journey.  

 

images*TEAR SOUP a beautiful book and recipe for healing after loss.  It is a wonderful story of validating grief as an emotion, and helps others to better understand and appreciate this grieving time.  It’s a must read, especially for children, who have experienced loss. 

 

Grief, an emotional journey forced upon us, causing us to accept this ‘new emotion’ as the circle of life continues on.  Showing no partiality to race, ethnicity, people group, age, gender or social status, we are all affected in some way by GRIEF.  We can only willingly learn to incorporate these intense feelings into our daily routine, and eventually a new normal will evolve in time.   

 

Grace Be Upon You In This Time…

~~PAM~~  

       

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2 thoughts on “Managing Grief During The Holidays

  1. brooktroutwife says:

    This does make it tough this time of year. I like your suggestion of trying to “Finding Creative Ways to Honor that which has brought about the grief.” Thank you for reminding us that we are not the only ones with these feelings this time of year.

    Liked by 1 person

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